Reasons Marriages Fail: Should we Blame Money?

In recent times, divorce rates all over the world have been skyrocketing and in comparison, marriage rates are falling fast. Since 1972, the rate is marriages have been declining at an alarming rate in the United States and as of today, marriages have decreased by almost 50% and it is estimated that around half of these marriages end in divorce. Now, Let’s Know the about the Reasons why Marriages Fail and Should we Blame Money for it?

Reasons Marriages Fail: Should we Blame Money?

Now, these divorces may be due to various reasons, the difference of opinion being one, other reasons may be lack of commitment, Domestic arguments, and abuse or unrealistic expectations. But there is a general belief that money is one of the leading causes of fights and consequently, divorce in married couples. This is not very hard to believe once we look around ourselves, we are living in a failing economy, and money is one of the major things on everybody’s mind.

We are surrounded by social media influencers flaunting their rich lifestyles, and while it is a great form of entertainment, it also causes people to harbor negative feelings about their monetary condition, and more often than not these feelings will spill out over their relations, causing serious arguments.

Why and Which Money-Related Issues cause divorce

We have provided a list of some of the most common problems that married couples face and how they are related to money/finances:

  • Money Leading To Other Issues: A recent survey of divorced people revealed that while “money arguments” is the 3rd cause of divorce among Americans, the leading one being basic incompatibility, many of the other issues (even incompatibility) that led to divorce could also be traced back to having stemmed from financial issues.  For example, in many cases, money problems led to domestic abuse which later caused a divorce.
  • Attitude Regarding Handling of Finances: It happens a lot that once married, both partners realize that they have a completely different view of how and what to spend. One partner might be big on saving while another might be a huge spender. This can lead to arguments and resentment between both parties as one might feel the other is holding them back.
  • Debt: The constant looming realization that your debt is growing is enough to ruin any person’s peace, and especially if one partner keeps racking up debt while the other suffers to pay it off will lead to a rift between them both that can later cause permanent separation.
  • Financial Infidelity: Financial infidelity refers to when one keeps their finances hidden from their spouse, this includes a secret bank account, spending behind your partner’s back, or debt that your significant other might be unaware of. Sometimes you may be loyal to your partner in marriage but not in money and this cause a lack of trust which later becomes the bane of the relationship.
  • Combining Bank Accounts: After marriage, many couples opt to combine their bank accounts into one and while that may be a great show of trust and commitment, it may cause considerable mental stress to one or both partners.
  • Expanses after Marriage: Many people underestimate the costs of getting married and the expenses that come later, especially if one opts to have kids, this might cause increased fights and disagreement.
  • Insecurity: Sometimes partners, especially men, may feel insecure if their spouse earns more than them. They might feel insignificant and start resenting the other person.

How to overcome these problems:

  1. Financial Counselling before marriage: Even before you get married, both parties should talk to a financial counselor and figure out how to proceed forward in their relationship. This can help avoid any problems later in the marriage.
  1. Mature Discussions: Blaming each other for the losses is never going to work out in anyone’s favor, if you feel insecure or worried about some financial issue, it is advisable to sit down and talk to your partner. You must keep in mind that it is not you vs them, it is you both vs the problem.
  1. No Secrets: Make sure that your marriage is built on mutual trust and understanding, that you both talk to each other and are open about all things that might affect your partner. This includes discussion about money, priorities, and the future. 
  1. Creating a Financial Plan: It is always a good plan to sit down and devise a plan regarding how you want to move forward and stick to it. Create a plan that lists your spending and expenses well as all you earn, a plan that will be feasible for all and both parties can agree on.
  1. Separate Finances: Many couples prefer to keep a joint bank account and while it may work out for some, it might have the opposite effect on other. For those people that are not comfortable with combining their accounts, it might be better to keep entirely separate accounts. Some experts even advise that each person should keep a separate account as well as a combined account for them both to not cause mistrust between them.

In the end, we can all agree that money is incredibly important especially when one lives in the capitalist economy-driven world of today and the monetary issues mentioned above do become way too much of a problem in marriages to ignore but that does not mean that it has to be the death sentence for all marriages. So, it is advisable to be aware of the difficulties one might face after marriage and to ready oneself for them. While many marriages have ended due to money, many have continued to strive.

Frequently Asked Questions

Q. How much does getting a divorce cause?

Ans: On average, around $7,000 but this may vary.

Q. Is money the leading cause of divorce?

Ans: Money is one of the leading causes of divorce.

Reasons Marriages Fail: Should we Blame Money?

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